It’s been years since I wrote my first letter to my younger self. I think its about time to write another one. In my first letter, I wrote about how much I love myself. How I don’t want to change anything. But life has a way of changing us, in his time and his way….
Well, it’s been years since I wrote you a love letter and I think its about time to write you another one. I am now forty nine years old. Hair is constantly getting gray. I am also starting to get lots of aches and pains, but, this is not what all I am writing you about.
You see, I told you how much I have loved every bit of you then and how much I don’t want to change anything. I still do. I still love every bit of you. Through the years, I succeeded in staying the same. But I found out that life has a way of changing us. I’m talking about everyday experiences, the people you’ve met through the years, people you reconnected time and again, your relationships, emotional sufferings and pains, unmet expectations, feeling you are a failure among other things. These things, they take a toll on you overtime. I guess it’s because you tried so hard to be strong and tried so hard to take responsibility for everything. Through the years, you took everything in silence. You blame yourself if things didn’t turn out right and you carry on the guilt that isn’t yours in the first place. And you end up hurting yourself.
Today, you are a different person. You realized that you can’t be responsible for everything. And because, you dropped that responsibility, you don’t worry as much, you don’t talk as much, you don’t share as much, you don’t care as much and you don’t love as much. I’d like to say that people fail me but I think it’s wrong to blame others for what I’ve become.
Honestly, I don’t think this is bad. I think, I am stronger. I think I am wiser. Yes, people changed. You did…and trust me,
You needed it.
All I can say is, embrace the change. But do keep some of the original ones.
Until next time…